The other side of the mirror

So much is written and discussed about old age people. Their problems - financial, social and physical - but very rarely the other side of the story.

In Bangalore, so many young couples are working in IT industry in different shifts and coping with various time zones. They also have children (one or two maximum). In previous times most of the parents had worked in govt. authorities or nine - to - six schedule. We have always seen our father at home latest by 6:30pm to spend time with us or reading newspaper alongwith tea and pakodas. Children were studying in govt. schools ( without any shame) or public schools fee structure was also not very heavy. Mothers used to work at home and there was rarely any pressure of being a working mother. Parents also had pension schemes in their organisation for their old age and therefore very less worry about saving too much.
But today things are changed and money plays a big role. This generation works in multinational companies in odd shifts. These companies does not provide any security after leaving the company. On top of it, immense pressure of children's upbringing and their education. Cut throat competition and job hopping have made the things even worst. It is a continuous race. Most of the young parents are working in different locations away from their birthplace and relatives.
With all this, so much hype is created for old age parents and their mental insecurities. Although parents have saved for themselves and often they does not want to stay with their children as their son and daughter-in-law is working and they have to take care of grand children. Even if a full time maid is appointed at home but keeping an eye on the maid is a responsibility. Odd shifts and kids with various class schedules and gizmos are another tension to grand parents.
I feel that it should be the personal choice of the parents and children if they want to be together or away from each other. But there should not be any pressure or blame game. Most of the times children listen from their relatives that they have left their parents alone but it is not always true. Sometimes parents does not want to be a solution for their children's hectic schedule and odd working hours. They don't want to be disturbed with the noise of kitchen when their son or DIL (daughter-in-law) has come home mid-night after work. They don't want to be disturbed when DIL is getting up wee hours to prepare food for the family because she has to start for work early morning. They don't want to be the helping hand but just want to enjoy their old age nicely with bhajans and friend's gathering. They judge their kids love with the money they have spent on them.
I don't have any issues if they choose to be away from their son, as they have all the right to enjoy their last days of life after so many responsibilities but they should make this clear to all the friends and relatives that it is their own choice and their son has not left them alone. We should rather try to be together emotionally if not physically.
Everyone will reach to this old age and kids observes how we treat our parents. They learn values from the behaviour of their parents. Being money wise is good but sometimes we should trust our children.